could men and women be just friends?

Yes, yes. I know this is a well discussed topic.

It came up again tonight after dinner with Charlie and Katia. In my experience, it is possible. Althought I have wavered a bit on this topic in the last few years. I have had a diverse set of experiences.

There has been at least one occasion when I fell in love with a good friend. I was 16, I think I just couldn't tell between great friendship and love. But once we cleared things up (or she cleared things up by telling me that she didn't want anything except friendship), we went back to being good friends again. Didn't miss a beat. As a matter of fact, I am actually the godfather of her daughter. See, it works.

I could name a few good female friends whom I have never had a sexual thought about. But, I will also say that as I grow older, I find it more difficult to build profound friendships with women. Not that I don't want to become good friends with women any more, but I think as you get older, the more in contact with the real world you are. Unfortunately, the majority inhabitants of the "real world" don't believe in friendship between men and women. And that has had an impact on me.

For example, my ex-grl friend repeatedly ask me about this good friend I have had since college: "come on, honestly, you have never had ANY romantic feelings for her." No. I can honestly say never. In this case, my ex even knew the good friend since college, but still, she suspected. I think attitudes like this do have an impact.

Imagine you becoming good friends with a member of the opposite sex. Let's say me, with a women. Now I have two things to worry about. First, what does the husband of the women approve of this friendship, and the fact that I have lnuch with her once every other week just to catch up. Second, what do I say when I go home, and my girl friend (or wife) ask whom I had lunch with? I wouldn't question the friendship beyond what it is, but the environment does, and makes it more complecated than it is.

Things just get more completed when you grow up. Peter Pan rules, he never had issues becoming good friends with Wendy.